lover's day

a-) Mom, your blog profile picture is ridiculous
b-) this weeks free song on Itunes is great, get it while it's hot. (Hometown Glory).

On to business. Going with the theme of the day, I decided to make my English class more entertaining. The class is all women that work in an office/school nearby. They are always being silly and kidding each other about being single. I decided on the ad-hoc topic of 'relationships'. I had a list of questions I asked them and proceeded to have them answer in English.

Question: What are common reasons for couples to break up?

First (quite assertive) answer: Men decide they aren't men. My ex-boyfriend decided he was a woman.

I won't assume this only happens in Bangkok, but I am going to make and educated assumption that it is quite common here. I was thinking more along the lines of different interests, bad communication, cheating to be causes for a break up. But no, men becoming women. Of course, that one might have slipped my mind on Valentines Day.

Bangkok would be a gender studies specialist's playground. Gender is viewed so differently here, women as women, men as men, women as men, and most commonly men as women. I bought fruit on the street tonight from a man with his nails perfectly painted pink. Which sex does he prefer? The pink nails would not help to make that guess. What I might have viewed as quirky 9 months ago or what might get men shot in TX, now seems quite normal if not comforting. I enjoy the grey area and the ability for affection within each sex not to automatically be stereotyped as romantic. I favor the idea that men can wear the colours they choose without being judged. This whole nation is wearing pink in reverence to the king. However, I do sometimes find it challenging to determine accurately which sex a given individual is here. Physically both adult men and women have more similar characteristic to each other in comparison to their western counterparts. Hence why Christina and I refer to ourselves as a third sex here, western women. All this to say, I have learned quite a bit here, more than textbooks could ever supply. Even what once was common ground, the idea of gender, I have to realize is really more a social construct than natural inclination. Given the choice, would women naturally choose to wear heels if they never saw their mothers in them?

I do not miss the macho, look at my scuffed up baseball cap and huge truck to prove that I am a man, men. I do however miss a world where men aren't constantly looking better in a mini skirt and heels than me. For that, I do have my limits. Women are competitive enough amongst themselves, we do not need men to fight off in the name of beauty.

happy valentines day.

P.S.

If anyone knows of a good grad program focused on Cultural and Gender Studies let me know. (Note: I am not looking for one that focuses on women's lib or the homosexual side).